im so fking demoralized and scared bc i got a rlly high chance of failing my gp during As omg???? i really dont get why my essay is always out of point when i ALWAYS TRY TO LINK BACK. and its not like my p2 is strong enough to pull my gp up man. so so scary bc if i fail gp i have to retake EVERYTHING. and its not jsut that, i cant retake h2 cse and i have to change my combi if i wna retake. i know i shouldnt even entertain all these thought of retaking and all but it really scares me how bad i did for gp and HOW FUCKING HELPLESS I FEEL BC THERES RLLY NTH I CAN DO TO MAKE MYSELF IMPROVE BC GP IS LIKE LANGUAGE YOU CANT DO MUCH TO HELP. I JUST FEEL SO FUCKING DUMB AND DENSE. WHAT CAN I DO???? FML. and then econs came. i failed my econs. and weihern who didnt rlly study for it actually passed it. i mean its fine he is clever and all but why does it feel that my hard work doesnt pay off at all?? i studied so much more than him and this is what i get. and 'call me econs god', 'see who passed econs?', 'wah didnt study also can pass' from him. fuck this its fine i will suck it up. i am just damn disappointed in myself. am i not doing enough? am i not studying hard enough? am i very lazy? i cant even find someone to rant to or talk about because it's gonna make them feel worse! sigh and i feel damn sad when my close friends dont do well. i rlly rlly want see all of us going into a decent uni and happy with our results. i dont think i can stand seeing them sad. sigh.

what a bad day today... and just right before going home i saw her name on his whatsapp chat. haha great. this is how bad my day can get.