so they're (jj wy yq tw) going tday agn. no one asked me out or whatever. i guess now i'm just plain air. no one realizes my existence. i think jj also wont think of me.. hais. i hate feeling left out...from everyone. i just have to get used to this. wait how many times have i said this? agh! sigh guess i really dont mean anything to tw or jj.. ytd me and tw smsed. i asked him if did he told jj anything about my this blog. he said no. im glad tht he didnt betray tht trust i gave him. he continued the conversation by asking about my lessons. we conversed for awhile and it ended. guess he is really happy with his life now, without me in anymore.
remember? i used to be like the yaqi now, going out with them, have fun etc... maybe she's like taking revenge now? ha, idk. not revenge but smth similar? forget it bah. she is still the same...i shall sit back and watch.
i really wanna be part of them, but it seems like...i wont be. i do question myself, why do i wanna go out with them? is it because...jj is thr? i cant be like this! i cant like him. this is leading me nowhere. deep inside i know, there's no way we gonna work.

You’re the only one I feel completely comfortable with. The one I can tell anything and everything to. You’re the one who makes me laugh and helps me out when i’m down. And I do the exact same for you. We’re always together but we’re not together. Only because of one problem: you’re in love with somebody else. So the only thing I can do is stand aside and watch you love her. 

I wish I could be completely honest and tell you when you make me feel a certain way but I have no right to feel this way. And you are completely oblivious to everything. I can’t expect you to know what I’m feeling especially when we are not together. We’re just friends.. so it’s wrong of me to get jealous when you talk about other girls. It’s wrong of me to get sad when you hang out with your friends and barely text me. I know its wrong but I can’t help but feel this. Maybe we should be more than friends.